There are two ways we remember our experiences: attached to emotions or attached to imagery. Therefore, we need to use both to recount what we know.
Start by drawing a timeline of your career. Plot the significant events (work and personal) and jot down next to the events how you remember feeling: excited, angry, pumped, disappointed.
When an event springs to mind recount it out loud to yourself, or even better, tell it to someone. Avoid writing these recollections down verbatim. Just right some rough notes. Otherwise, the temptation is to recount the experience the way you’ve written it which will sound unnatural.
You should have 4 or 5 stories now. Let’s switch to visual queues to remember some more. Head over to flickr or iStockphoto and select 30 images at random. Look at each one and see if any experiences spring to mind. Again, recount them and jot down some rough notes.
One of the best ways to remember your own stories is to hear others. Find a couple of colleagues, friends and just get reminisced about the good old days. Make notes about any anecdote that springs to mind about your own experiences at work focusing on the ones that set you apart.
In fact you should always carry a story notebook to jot them down because they often creep up on you by surprise and I will guarantee you will forget it instantly if you don’t either write it down of have the opportunity to tell the story a couple of times.
Practicing and improving your stories
Your first retellings will tend to be rambling and, quite frankly, boring. The rambling nature of the story, however, is often reduced by telling the story to people and watching their response.
Getting feedback in the form of their response to your story (facial expressions, comments – nothing formal) will tell you what to keep and what to jettison. But you can do more.
You can increase the impact of any story in three ways:
- be specific and avoid generalizations. Instead of saying, “I once worked for company that sold database software.” Say, “While the pre-sales manager at Oracle Systems …”
- the story has to about a specific individual trying to achieve something, ideally with some obstacle that they eventually overcame. Avoid stories about companies, departments and even teams. Tell stories about people who have names.
Instead of saying, “In 2004 the risk assessment team was facing a problem …,” say “Charles Kleiner in risk assessment was facing a problem.” And of course you were instrumental in helping Charles overcome this obstacle.
- help people visualize what’s happening. The best stories are ones that the listener can picture vividly in their mind’s eye. Instead of saying, “We drove up to the vineyard …,” say “We drove up to an adobe-style vineyard with acres of vines all around us …”
Every story we tell gives people an insight into who we are. They are quite revealing. So before you tell them to an interviewer it’s a good idea to tell your stories to a friend and ask them about the qualities they inferred about you based on the story. Is it resilience, courage, persistence, creativity etc.?
You will be surprised to find that a story which you thought, for example, was about persistence, comes across to the listener as arrogance. You will want to avoid those ones.
Speaking of things to avoid, no one wants to hear your life story. They can read that in your resume. They want to hear about the specific moments in your life where you made a difference. Use your stories.
Now you should have a dozen good stories to tell at the interview. Practice them whenever you can. In casual conversations, when the time is right, say something like, “Yes, that reminds me of …”
By practicing your stories in natural, conversational settings you will be in a better position to repeat your story in this natural way at the interview which will convey tremendous confidence.
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